Let You Go

October 18th, 2007

Every kiss
Is filled with lies
And with each one
A part of me dies
And from your lips
I feel the pain
It’s taking me over
And drives me insane
Then in your eyes
The lies are showing
And the pain doesn’t stop
It’s only growing
And I wonder
If you can feel my heart breaking
There’s something from me
That you’re taking
I gave you my love
But it wasn’t enough
Don’t you know
I’m not that tough
I want to know
What you’re thinking about
Are all your thoughts about me
Just doubt
I’m falling in love
And it’s breaking my heart
And all my world
Is falling apart
There’s still so much
That I don’t know
And I wish that I could
Let you go

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Footprints

August 29th, 2007

Such a kiss
With only half feeling
My heart is still
In the process of healing
The night is coming
To an end
And in the morning
You’ll still just be my friend
If you don’t love me
Don’t even try to fake it
I gave you my heart
It’s okay if you break it
I want to know
What’s on your secretive mind
And see behind
What leaves me blind
A girl like you
Can only do my heart no good
You left footprints in my heart
In every place you stood
Never before
Have I felt anything like this
And every time I’m alone
It’s you I start to miss

Band Tee

December 20th, 2018

I was young when I first met you
You caught my eye and I thought “you’re cute”
You looked at me and you felt it too
I took a leap with no parachute

[Chorus:]
Run away and bring me along
If I’m with you nothing can go wrong
You’ll sing with me to my favorite song
In your jeans with your band tee on

You pick me up in your silver car
Take me away, I don’t care how far
Serenade me with your guitar
I’ll write you songs for my repertoire

[Chorus:]
Run away and bring me along
If I’m with you nothing can go wrong
You’ll sing with me to my favorite song
In your jeans with your band tee on

In your arms you’re my sanctuary
You keep me safe like it’s necessary
And keep me warm when it’s January
I’m so thankful it’s you I married

[Chorus:]
Run away and bring me along
If I’m with you nothing can go wrong
You’ll sing with me to my favorite song
In your jeans with your band tee on

Disclosure: I don’t usually write ‘happy’ things, and I scarcely write songs. However, I enjoyed how this turned out. This song is meant to be pop-country and started from the line “In your jeans with your band tee on”.

Acquainted

December 17th, 2018

So many people to meet everyday
That many people could never stay
So many memories that I replay
In red plaid I ran away
So many people left to meet
But I have grown so obsolete
In my head it just repeats
I’ve been carried away by my feet
So many strangers that I see
So much to say in poetry
I’ll let them know this side of me
Because in my words I’ll be set free

2018 Concluded

Happy New Year! I don’t make personal posts often – but I decided to post a recap of 2018! This last year flew by so quickly; between work and school, there was always a lot going on! I feel like I was just doing my start of the year Whole 30 (oh wait – maybe because I’m also doing that right now).

Last year I took the Myers-Briggs Personality Test which really explained a lot about myself to me. My results determined that I am an INFP personality type. One thing that I read was that many INFP’s are writers, poets, and actors. I have been writing for many years, and that made me decide on creating my blog.

“INFPs have a talent for self-expression, revealing their beauty and their secrets through metaphors and fictional characters.”

INFP-T

I also got married in July! The first half of the year I spent on all the planning, little details and crafting. Most of my extra time went into getting everything together for our special day – which turned out fabulous.
Wedding 2018

After the wedding, I found that I had so much free time. This was now the time for me to work on my goals of starting a new blog, as I had stopped blogging in 2009 (old blog). In July I created my WordPress account as Karissa Doll-Urban. Being just married, I was still in between last names. Doll, my maiden name, is still relevant to my poetry – so I’ve decided to keep this username. By the end of the year, my blog had 725 different visitors with 1,207 views. I am in awe that my words have reached so many people and countries.

Blog 2018

After starting my blog, I felt brave enough to start doing poetry readings as well. I have posted some of my readings to the blog – stay tuned for more in this new year! Shine 2018

My last update is that music is still one of my greatest inspirations. I would go as far as saying I’m obsessed with Spotify after I listened to it for 78,546 minutes (54.54 days of non-stop music). I am constantly looking for new inspiration, and this year I would say that it was Chelsea Cutler. (Side note: Thomas Rhett, Taylor Swift and He Is We most likely ended up there because I saw them all in concert last year!)

Spotify 2018

If anyone is curious what inspires me, they can find my top 100 songs of 2018 below:

Thank you, everyone, for keeping up with me and my blog!

First

November 29th, 2018

The first time I fell in love
I was in it alone
I was a broken child
Who knew nothing but a broken home
The first time I said “I love you”
I had said it to myself
I’d only ever written it
And never dared to say it to anyone else
The first time I knew heartbreak
Was the first time I knew love
I was engulfed by the emotions
Or the lack thereof
Then when I first realized
That love should be embraced
That was the last abusive relationship
I ever let myself face

Disclosure: This is an emotional video clip of me from Christmas 2008. I recently watched through my old video journals and found this. In this clip, I encountered the first time I confessed to being in love. These words stuck in my head for a couple days and ended up inspiring this poem.

Final Sale

November 20th, 2018

There’s nothing new to write
I always feel the same way
I’m no different than my past
When I grew up in San Jose
I’m still the same person
I haven’t forgot
Ever since I was a child
I’ve been living a life that I’m not
I’m twenty-six years old
But in my heart I’m still sixteen
Facing the same problems
Like I’m stuck in a time machine
Will I ever grow?
Will I ever learn?
Or have I gone too far?
Am I at the point of no return?

Shelved

November 15th, 2018

My tears are on edge
But I can’t let them fall
I am stronger than this
I’m not some fragile doll
You could have told me
I’m braver than you think
But you cut me off like split ends
Before I could even blink
My heart is broken
But that won’t make you stay
And although I’ve cried no tears
It doesn’t mean that I’m okay
You’re just like the ocean
Your waves come and go
And after all this time
You’re someone I don’t know
But now that you are gone
I’ll find comfort by myself
Because you’re just another story
Left to sit on my shelve

Reflex

November 9th, 2018

I’m angry
There’s nothing I can do
I’m helpless
I just need to pull through
I’m speechless
But the action took place
I’m oblivious
My reaction is all over my face
I’m unstable
And grasping for closure
I’m a mess
Who can’t find composure
I’m broken
But I know that I will heal
I can’t learn to grow
If I don’t let myself feel